Airplanes and Babies (The Conclusion)

You know how people in most situations are assholes, but then a specific circumstance will occur that will make them act 5000x nicer and more accommodating than normal? For example, the Jersey City Starbucks baristas are assholes. Seriously. They are not friendly, they do not care if you are a regular customer or a first time customer, they just want to do their job and go home. However, they love babies. You bring in a baby and they are giving free drinks, gushing over your babies’ cheeks, and are beyond friendly…

Traveling with Kinsey to Colorado is just like my trips to Starbucks.

I was so stressed out you guys. I had worked up about 20 different scenarios of how things were going to go, all of them ending badly. But, so far (I’m in mid flight), NONE OF THEM ARE HAPPENING.

I got to security and realized that I forgot to put my personal liquids in a ziploc. Kinsey’s bottle was fine, but I had Chapstick, lip gloss, hand sanitizer, and a huge container of baby butt cream. I pulled it all out and said to the guy “I’m so sorry, I forgot a bag so here is everything you have to throw away.” He SMILED, and said “nope, it’s all for the baby, I won’t take it” Now, he knows that babies’ don’t wear lip gloss but let me keep it anyway.

I got to my gate and the counter guy came to my seat and brought tags for my stroller. I didn’t even have to move. I get on the plane, the flight attendant says “honey, you can have this whole row of seats. I’ll strap your car seat in for you! Do you need to use the restroom? I can watch her or hold her for you?” I’m in disbelief right now. I was feeding Kinsey and the male flight attendant came over and packed up my bags and put them under the seat, then came back when we were in the air and pulled them back up on the seat next to me again.

Babies are your ticket to kindness people. Under normal circumstances, TSA are total buttheads, and generally speaking, flight attendants are annoyed with you if you don’t follow the rules. But, I’m being treated like a celebrity…a celebrity with a baby…like Victoria freaking Beckham!

Side note: Kinsey is sleeping soundly. I am totally winning right now.


On Mice

Remember the rustle that was not a ghost? The exterminator has now come twice. Plus, we have found a dead mouse, plus more droppings as if the dead mouse has multiple furry friends.

Here’s the deal. I randomly get really stressed about the mice. Last night, Franny was rummaging in the kitchen. Zoey randomly barked…THEN, I swear I heard a squeal and then one of the dogs coughed. Do you think one of them digested a mouse? Can dogs even catch mice? I was tossing and turning last night because of my nasty cold and everytime I thought Bryant was awake too, I would mumble “mouse…there’s a mouse” and Bryant would say “Katie, dogs can’t catch nice.” A few hours later, I’d swear I heard a scurry…so I didn’t go to the bathroom until broad daylight because mice only come out at night right?!?!? RIGHT?!

It’s a good thing I’m leaving tomorrow. Because I’m losing my mind.

Airplanes and Babies

Today we are packing the shit out of our apartment. It’s a disaster right now so we are hoping by tonight everything will be done.

The greater concern: I’m getting on a plane on Tuesday with Kinsey and heading to Colorado to be with family for a few days. Me + 7 week old baby, flying…alone. I plan to apologize in advance when I get on the plane. Something like “I know what you are thinking, I’m thinking the same thing, and oh shit doesn’t quite cover it. I apologize in advance. Please don’t be mean to me.” The one positive is that I’m flying Southwest. I’ll get priority boarding, plus, maybe some cute grandma will sit next to me…or no one. They’ll take one look and say nope, not gonna happen. I have a really awesome scenario worked out in my head. I booked the 7:40am flight. I’m hoping I can literally move Kinsey from bed to carseat, to car, through security, then to plane, then she’ll wake up and say “Good Morning! Where am I? I don’t care, let’s eat.” And the plane will take off. Genius right? Unrealistic? Yes, I know, I’m screwed. More importantly, what happens if I have to pee? Forget that, I think I gave up the freedom of relieving myself when necessary once I had a baby. Now, I’m forced to endure years of doing the potty dance.

Pray for me.