Let’s All Watch the Bachelor : Week 4

Let’s all watch the Bachelor, you guys!

“He took the Iraqi to the desert”-Selma.

The Bachelor starts with a one on one date. Sean chooses Selma. Sean takes her to the desert and she makes sure to let us know how disappointed she is. They are driving around Joshua Tree National Park, and Sean tells us that he plans to “test” Selma today. Poor, Selma. Selma is basically complaining the way that I would expect Olivia Palermo to complain if she was on this date. We find out that Sean and Selma are going to rock climb. Selma is hilariously girlie. Sean asked her what size of shoes she wears, and she says “6 inch heels.” I really love Selma. The girl rock climbs! Like a boss! I bet Sean is going to talk about how impressed he is with Selma. He just said it. After rock climbing, they go to a trailer park (literally), in the middle of nowhere, to have dinner. Selma reveals to Sean that she grew up in a very conservative family. She was raised Muslim, and she doesn’t feel comfortable showing physical affection on national television because of her strict upbringing.

Back at the mansion, the date card is read. Tierra talks about how she doesn’t want to go on another group date. Guess who is going on another group date?!! You guessed it, Tierra (great job with that editing ABC).

Back at the trailer park, Sean says he wants to kiss Selma, and she says no. Selma goes into further detail about how her Mom did not approve her going on the show, and public dating is really not acceptable. Selma, I’m pretty happy that you are on the show. You just added an unexpected twist. Sean, because he is a good guy, doesn’t care that Selma can’t kiss him, and he asks if she will accept the rose. Sean says he is crazy about Selma. Let me just say, I am going to be really annoyed if we have to hear them talk about how much they want to kiss each other, every single time they have one on one time. But, now that Kacie B. is gone, I think I might be cheering for Selma.

On the group date, Sean takes the girls to a Roller Derby rink. This might be the best group date activity in Bachelor history.

822x(Photo Credits: ABC.com)

The girls get all suited up, and Amanda the vampire tells everyone that she has played roller derby before, but she is lying. Amanda is so tricky and devious. For some reason, these girls do not even know how to roller skate. Sarah is really struggling, and I feel really bad for her. Her balance is off, and she is really upset that having one arm is interfering with her ability. Ashlee is so sweet, and gives Sarah a pep talk. Sean does too, but it is important that we note that Ashlee and Sarah are friends. Sarah decides to get back out there and try again. The girls continue practicing, when suddenly, Amanda eats it. I laughed really hard, then realized that Amanda may have crushed bones in her chin. Sorry that I laughed at you, Amanda. They call an ambulance for the second time this season. They tell Amanda that she may have broken her jaw, and they take her to the hospital. This stresses Sean out, and he calls off the bout, and they decide to just roller skate, 90’s style. Sean then takes the girls to the Roosevelt Hotel for drinks.

Sean has one on one time with Sarah first. They still like each other. Meanwhile, the girls are having really awkward conversations. Amanda shows up, and it looks like she is just fine! Yay! Amanda says that she is going to play the sympathy card, and her devious ways get her a kiss on the chin.

Back at the mansion, another date card arrives. Daniella is crazy intense, and believes the date is for her. But, no, Leslie H. gets the date. Leslie H! Finally! IT’S YOUR TURN, GIRL! Daniella, come on girlfriend, put away those evil eyes. Leslie H has been losing dates to Leslie M since day 1.

Back at the group date, guess who is getting in a fight?! Robyn and Tierra! I called it guys! Tierra keeps saying that she isn’t going to let the other girls bother her. Who thinks that Tierra is full of it?! Tierra starts talking to a producer asking if she can leave, while Sean is busy making out with the drunken wedding dress girl. I already forgot that girl’s name. Tierra is letting the girls bother her?! Tierra? You said you weren’t going to do that. Drunken wedding dress girl is being pretty aggressive with Sean, and invites him into the hot tub. Tierra is having some sort of crazy meltdown. Whoa! Tierra! That was creepy. Where did you come from? She pulls Sean aside, and she is talking about how she is really sensitive and Sean is trying to convince Tierra to stay. I’m pretty certain that Tierra isn’t really going to leave, she is just throwing a tantrum so she can monopolize Sean’s time. This girl just won herself a rose, I think. Look at her stupid smile. HAHAHA! These girls are hilarious. “He won’t let her ruin the night! He won’t give her the rose!” Oh girls, you are so silly. Sean gives Tierra the rose! Girls, let’s all make sure we learned a lesson from Kacie B. Don’t get petty!

So, I don’t really think that Leslie H is going to get the rose on her one on one date. But, we’ll see what happens. Her and Sean have been pretty awkward together so far, so, I bet we are in for an awkward date. But maybe, I will be surprised. Here we go. Leslie H is excited about her diamond earrings. Sean pulls up in a convertible. He references his “immediate connection” with Leslie H, and I just made a weird face. It is not that I don’t like Leslie H. I just think they are really uncomfortable together. Anyway, they go cruising down to Rodeo Drive, and they decide to go shopping. Sean takes Leslie to Badgley Mischka. I feel like Leslie H is sort of acting like this is completely normal. She is all flattered, but, honey! It’s Badgley Mischka! Why aren’t you screaming?! This is so awkward. Please tell me she does not get to keep that Neil Lane necklace. This is bullshit, you guys. Leslie H says she can see Sean as her future husband.

(Snack Tip: I put my Trader Joe’s Peanut Butter Cups in the Freezer. You know how they get really creamy? Yeah, I am a genius).

Sean and Leslie H are at a fancy restaurant. Sean is talking about romantic feelings, and I don’t think he is having them for Leslie H. They just seem like two friends having dinner. I know there is a Twitter handle for Tierra’s eyebrow, but they should also make one for Leslie H’s eyebrows. Wow, I really called this one. Sorry, Leslie H. Sean really shouldn’t have grabbed the rose so that he could break up with Leslie H. That was pretty misleading. Leslie H tells Sean to watch his back, and exits. She says that she saw herself in the end, which is really stupid. She’s a cute girl, but seriously. Bye, Leslie H! Sean meanwhile listens to two guys serenade him on the guitar alone, and then he drops the rose dramatically over the balcony. What a waste.

At the cocktail party, Sean makes a really big deal about how he sent Leslie H home. It is a little early for this to be an issue, but whatever. Sean has one on one time with Ashlee, and he apologizes for not having time with her on the group date. Sean has one on one time with Robyn, and she is wearing a really pretty dress! Robyn and Sean kiss, which took me by surprise. They haven’t spent a lot of time together either.

Desiree might be planning to pull a Kacie B.

Tierra pulls Jackie and Robyn aside and apologizes to them for her outburst on the group date, but doesn’t really because she starts attacking them at the same time. Robyn and Jackie say that they appreciate Tierra’s apology and then slam her to the other girls. Drama.

Catherine and Sean have one on one time, and they seem to really like each other.

My prediction is that Daniella is going home, and maybe Jackie? I don’t know. Let’s find out!

Rose Ceremony!

Tierra and Selma already have roses.

Catherine gets a rose!

Desiree gets a rose!

Lindsay (thats drunk wedding dress girl’s name. Duh!) gets a rose!

Lesley M gets a rose!

Robyn gets a rose!

AshLee gets a rose!

Sarah gets a rose!

Jackie gets a rose! (I was wrong!)

Oh wait, only 1 girl is going home tonight?

Daniella gets a rose!? WHAT!

Amanda the vampire and her devious ways have not won her a rose. I am shocked. How surprising. No explanation either. He must have realized that she was empty inside.

Let’s remember week 2 when Amanda was being all creepy on the couch.

The-Bachelor-2013-Amanda

(Photo Credits: GossipCop)

You guys! We get TWO NIGHTS of the Bachelor next week?!?! HAHAHAHA! They get hypothermia! Oh my gosh. This season is awesome. I can’t wait.

See you next week!

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